We easily consume more vodka than the Romanovs in 1918…
We keep out of rehab… if you
can’t handle your booze, you’re not a true WASP.
We believe depression is weak—therapy is for the nouveau riche.
Any good WASP relies on
booze and sports to get through a rough day.
We pour our liquor from Crystal Decanters, which is a proud display of our true diet staple, and also promptly provides sips to any incoming guest... Only to be served out of one the glasses from the engraved crystal set Uncle Bink gave ya for graduation.
With crystal glassware there's an array of engraving options:
Monogram, Last Name, School Insignia, the Estate's Name, or Family Crest.
WASPs tend to be functioning alcoholics, there’s nothing wrong with drinking yourself to sleep when you still wakeup every morning and run show.
Toddie Time: (we drink toddies, not cocktails) This is the hour(s) prior to dinner set aside for drinking, chatting and nibbling on hors d'oeuvres...
Not to be confused with:
After Dinner Drinks: Which is when we retreat to a more comfortable room to smoke cigars and sip brandy.
Terrific Toddies:
Bloody Marys
Since WASPs tend to drink their meals, the Bloody is a common alternative to breakfast, especially for those hair of the dog days.
Gin & Tonics
Taking a tip from our ancestors during the days of imperialism, only we do it to prevent sobriety not malaria.
Mint Juleps
Every sip takes us back to our delightful days at the Kentucky Derby.
The Dirty Martini
Knowing full well that it is to be made with gin, not vodka.
